August 2012
mishacollinsbutt:
why can’t i walk around shirtless
what is so offensive about boobs
s-oldieron:
what do you even do with 19 medals?
use them as cup coasters? hang them in your bathroom?
play frisbee?
“oops i threw it over the fence”
“that’s okay i have 18 more”
Me watching the Olympics at age 9: Oh that's nice
Me watching the Olympics at age 13: Wow I hope we win
Me watching the Olympics at age 17: I'm going to fuck the entire swim team and no one can stop me
brightredkettle:
are you the SAT because i’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes
Watch
So there's only one channel in this motel,
madeofmetals:
This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street.
They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh.
Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel,...
July 2012
traumatrae:
I don’t find myself unattractive, but I also don’t find myself attractive. I feel like I’m just sort of here, not something that really grabs anyone’s attention. Sort of like a chair. Or maybe a lamp.
im so tired i could eat a horse
i identify as a horse and this offends me
i identify as offends and this horses me
I offend horses, identify me.
i think the main question here is why would you eat a horse if you were tired
